I know this is supposed to be a blog about Lexi, but I wanted to share some things that have been on my mind.
I have spent the day reflecting and mulling over the past year of my life. I have been asking myself these questions:
Am I where I want to be in life?
Have I accomplished the goals I have set for myself?
Where am I going from here?
Am I successful?
I consider there to be two eras in my life: pre-Lexi days and post-Lexi days. The pre-Lexi Amanda would be disappointed at where I am. She had it all figured out. I was supposed to graduate, then get an accounting job, then go to graduate school to get a master's in accounting. Then I was supposed to work myself to death for a big 4 firm until I achieved a CFO position at a large public company. Then I would become CEO of that company. Ambitious much?
So yeah. Working for a small private company was not on the list. But the thing is... I am so content with it. I am so glad that God has bigger and better plans than I do. All of my ambitions and goals have changed. Lexi has done something to me that I never anticipated. She has made me grow in ways I never expected, has stretched me to love to greater boundaries than I thought possible. What once seemed so important: career, money, chasing that next self-gratification, all seem so irrelevant. My career ambitions have fell by the wayside, not because I'm incapable or lazy, but because their priority is less than that of my daughter.
The thing is, it's not what you achieve in life. It's really not. You can travel the world. You can attain the most successful position in the corporate world. You can become a celebrity or a model. These are all fleeting. They do not add richness to your life. You will not be bringing these things to heaven. The real value that you add to your life are the people that you spend it with. Your family. Your children. Your friends. These relationships are the only things that will transcend Earth. I am very excited that in heaven I will get to spend eternity with all of you beautiful people that God has surrounded me with on Earth.
